Flowing like the Nile

What's up players? Hope things have been goin good for you guys, because the only things flownin nicely over here have been coming out of my ass.  

As you could probably tell by the last couple posts, things could be going better for your ol' friend Boosh.  As a matter of fact, I didn't think it could be going any worse.  Boy did I underestimate the bad luck power 2011 is bringing.

If you read the drivel below this, you most likely know I busted my knee again.  Now, when I tore my shit up I had to wait 4 days to go the doctor.  In the mean-time, my dad brought me over some black market pain killers, provided by one of his friends who'd gotten quite a few back surgeries.  It was a smorgasbord of pills in a bag.  His friend wrote me a note which described the pills inside.  Round white was somas and the regular pill shape was vicodin. The dark horse were some basketball shaped orange pills with S1 on them, which he described as "low strength morphine."

I ended up letting most of the pills sit there, until it was just the "morphine" left.  About two weeks after I originally hurt that bastard of a knee I tweaked it again.  I figured I'd take about 4 of those low grade painkillers and just pass out, so that's what I did.  What I woke up in the morning to was something out of a horror film.

Now, I'm no stranger to sitting on the toilet.  Nobody is.  But what I'm a stranger to is sitting on the toilet 15 times a day, which is what happened when I woke up.  I looked up the pills online and, turns out, I had taken an elephant size dose of laxatives, bred to treat extreme constipation.  It was hell on earth.  I left the house for two days after that armed with an industrial sized roll of TP, should the moment strike when I least expected.  

Turns out, it did.  I was lucky enough to avoid a street dooks, but I did make the mistake of going out to a friend's party that night.  It was at a bar filled with skateboarders which, as you know, don't really take kindly to following the hiegeine norm.  After 3 trips to the bathroom, and waiting for the only toilet to clear out, I decided two things.  Never take a pill without properly checking up on it and never going outside after you've OD'd on laxatives.  I sure hope February holds some different luck because, as of now, I am 100% shit out of luck.  Figuratively and literally.